I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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