i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
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