Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
