Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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