omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
