somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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