Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
