Midget sex pt 2 tonight
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
