saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Randomize
