Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
