my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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