i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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