I am puke
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.