She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext