Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep

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(586): I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep http://tfl.nu/zumz

Replies (3) Good night (868) Bad night (704)
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(312): View more from Illinois

Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.

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(312): Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired. http://tfl.nu/6uiz

Replies (23) Good night (4052) Bad night (838)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.

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(203): Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door. http://tfl.nu/li4e

Replies (10) Good night (4789) Bad night (748)
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(941): View more from Florida

thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.

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(941): thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated. http://tfl.nu/xw0x

Replies (17) Good night (17298) Bad night (1308)
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(859): View more from Kentucky

Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.

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(859): Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke. http://tfl.nu/i77o

Replies (8) Good night (817) Bad night (2609)
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(734): View more from Michigan

So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.

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(734): So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot. http://tfl.nu/gct9

Replies (3) Good night (933) Bad night (872)
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(906): View more from Michigan

3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.

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(906): 3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on. http://tfl.nu/uzvi

Replies (3) Good night (1499) Bad night (686)
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(713): View more from Texas

Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?

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(713): Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out? http://tfl.nu/0l6b

Replies (7) Good night (2027) Bad night (702)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.

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(414): i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome. http://tfl.nu/5y9x

Replies (2) Good night (1175) Bad night (500)
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(310): View more from California

I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.

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(310): I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated. http://tfl.nu/zxsm

Replies (6) Good night (1933) Bad night (577)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"

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(412): okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain" http://tfl.nu/zllc

Replies (2) Good night (804) Bad night (505)
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(660): View more from Missouri

hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?

(816): View more from Missouri

yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward

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(660): hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv? (816): yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward http://tfl.nu/dn5c

Replies (12) Good night (1551) Bad night (513)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.

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(902): I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks. http://tfl.nu/hv7j

Replies (5) Good night (991) Bad night (429)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"

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(919): Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY" http://tfl.nu/33j3

Replies (0) Good night (272) Bad night (378)
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(404): View more from Georgia

Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.

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(404): Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday. http://tfl.nu/16cb

Replies (1) Good night (230) Bad night (359)

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