Texts From Last Night

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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.

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  (918): I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler. http://tfl.nu/ufcl
  Replies (63) Good night (5236) Bad night (1285)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!

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  (405): I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh! http://tfl.nu/nhcn
  Replies (43) Good night (5031) Bad night (897)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!

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  (224): It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU! http://tfl.nu/pir9
  Replies (47) Good night (5086) Bad night (797)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.

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  (905): The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty. http://tfl.nu/9wi8
  Replies (100) Good night (12349) Bad night (1922)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...

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  (763): Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg... http://tfl.nu/nasy
  Replies (44) Good night (2594) Bad night (6470)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship

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  (516): I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship http://tfl.nu/9ygn
  Replies (5) Good night (2341) Bad night (1896)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.

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  (512): Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom. http://tfl.nu/t8hh
  Replies (13) Good night (635) Bad night (2090)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO

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  (914): Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO http://tfl.nu/kxn2
  Replies (6) Good night (1839) Bad night (737)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.

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  (573): These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times. http://tfl.nu/8sq6
  Replies (2) Good night (1453) Bad night (395)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem

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  (832): Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem http://tfl.nu/ll71
  Replies (6) Good night (3208) Bad night (641)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game

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  (509): Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game http://tfl.nu/0fm6
  Replies (3) Good night (993) Bad night (617)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry

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  (715): Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry http://tfl.nu/21br
  Replies (8) Good night (684) Bad night (1240)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?

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  (718): He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible? http://tfl.nu/fv2h
  Replies (3) Good night (755) Bad night (385)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles

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  (434): After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles http://tfl.nu/5yst
  Replies (6) Good night (835) Bad night (393)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences

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  (610): Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences http://tfl.nu/5w4q
  Replies (1) Good night (500) Bad night (272)

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