I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
