You're a womanizer and a bitch.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
