So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
this boner is exhausting
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
