He told me they were just razor bumps!
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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