Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
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I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
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Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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