come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
