ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
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