Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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