we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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