remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
