My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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