He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
