Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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