quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
