I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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