Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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