He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
we should paint friendship bongs
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
