weddingsv make me drug and hornr
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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