Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
3pm strippers are depressing
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
