is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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