Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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