I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Say something about gay babies.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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