The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
