We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
