Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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