due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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