how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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