I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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