1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
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So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
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Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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