I don't think brook has ever known best
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
