the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
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