great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
