Don't you send me to vm
I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
