Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
