do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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