I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
