omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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